I recently was given a picture of myself around 1998. The picture is a true depiction of what being a mother of a lot of children is all about. It’s not very pretty. So I’m not posting it. Seriously it was horrid.
My friends will re-post blogs on parenting or raising children with cute pictures, dressed up babies and moms with their hair all done smiling pushing their children on swings. This is pure fiction people!
Raising kids is hard work, especially if you don’t want them to have tons of therapy in their 20’s and 30’s
A little back ground:
I had 4 kids in 5.5 years, my youngest daughter was born 3+ weeks early and weighed 5.5 lb and was 16.5″ long. Then at 3 weeks old she got bronchial pneumonia and was in the hospital for a week.
It’s odd how you remember some things and not others?….There were a lot of sick babies on that floor and I know some did not make it. I am so very thankful that she did.
I divorced and remarried and had 1 more to make an un-even 5.
I would not change any of the hardship, exhaustion, depression, sleep deprivation and lack of personal hygiene for all the money in the world, raising kids has been an adventure.
I did not always get it right, not even close.
What I have learned about parenting: In no particular order.
-Children are a gift. A pooping, puking, screaming gift.
-You don’t know how much will power and stamina you have until you’ve had 3 sick kids at once and have not slept in 48 hours.
-Do not take the “parenting” books to seriously they are mostly written by people who have no children….Using common sense will get you were you need to go.
-Dogs are not children it’s not comparable….Ignore all comments that start with “My puppy kept me up all night too…..” Just smile and nod.
-Life is too short to give a shit what people think, do the best you can.
-If your mother-in-law offers to take baby for a couple of hours, seize the moment ladies. Take a shower and a nap.
-Teach your kids to say No….Just not to you
-If your child asks a question, answer it honestly…You will be thankful for fostering honesty when they are teenagers, trust me.
-Let your kids play outside in the fresh air, you will be amazed at how well they sleep at night.
-It’s OK for a boy to play with Barbie’s, and OK for girls to play with trucks….It makes them well-rounded.
-My daughters ride dirt bikes, my sons are great cooks.
-Teach boys to do laundry and girls to change oil a significant other will thank you some day.
-Discipline is the hardest thing to teach children if you don’t have any? Neither will they.
-Respect your teenagers decisions (with-in reason). Watching your kids fail is harder on you than it is on them. So let them fail, hopefully they will learn from it.
-Make home a soft place to land. This is particularly helpful when they get into late teens early 20’s. They tend to really screw up around this time.
-Perfection is not obtainable so stop putting ridiculous amounts of pressure on your kids.
-Teach them respect, not only to respect others but to respect themselves.
-Kids always take out their frustration on the one they know will always be there, feel honored when they go off on you:)
-Lastly, and this is a big one……..Let kids entertain themselves, seriously ladies? Let them play Lego by themselves…There is nothing worse than inviting a kid over to play and they think that I need to play with them the entire time or have scheduled play time that I over see…. I do not have time! Kids should make up their own fun, stop hovering.
-Oh wait one more thing….while playing by themselves if conflict arises let them handle it, let them work it out on their own….This is for their own good, when they are adults they wont be looking for mom to tune in their over bearing boss……You think I’m kidding? I’m not.
and really for real lastly.
-What you remember and what your kids remember will be two totally different realities. I never knew until my kids got older that some things I felt horribly guilty about they don’t even remember and some ridiculous argument about a pair of socks has stuck with them for 15 years.
What I have learned over the past 22 years about parenting is that every parent thinks their kids are awesome, let them talk about their kids accomplishment. Give a mom a high-five for teaching her kids to say please and thank you. Help a mom out when she’s having a crappy day. Kind words go a long way when we are all fighting the same up hill battle.
We are truly all in this together.
~Real Housewives of Maine
Real housewives of Maine 
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